Oh the early 80's was a hellava time for some bizarre crossover genres like this. I mean we get this popular nightclub in New York for country artists that are the most critical individuals that clearly don't have any knowledge on the subject. So Jake Ferris(Dolly Parton) is stuck in this terrible contract by bar owner Freddie Ugo"F.U."(Ron Leibman) says she can get any average joe to wow this crowd. Enter in terrible cab driver, Nick(Sly Stallone). Enter in all the cliche elements of film about two people not wanting to do it but it comes together(Oh and Sly Stallone did write it). I liked seeing Richard Farnsworth as Dolly's dad cause he is a gem and Ron Leibman is great playing the villain but let's face it, especially today that Dolly was the standout as she always had this sparkle and incredible talent to just charm everyone with her geniality. I really think this movie is dated and not good but Mrs.Parton made it memorable even with it's awkwardness. I think "The best little whorehouse in Texas" is her at her best but honestly catching any amount of her skill is worth it.You will be missed Dolly Parton.
I have plumbed the depths of Zwartjes, Svankmajer, and Brakhage. I have watched bad horror films and fantastic exploitation films that leave behind the shackles of reality, that go for broke in terms of surreality. I have watched Hausu and Doggie Woggiez Poochie Woochiez and the entire Cremaster cycle. But until I sat through Bob Clark's Rhinestone, co-written by Sylvester Stallone and inspired by the song "Rhinestone Cowboy" (a song I admittedly kinda like), I was not truly versed in how weird cinema could be.We had to watch Tim Thomerson drink a mug of beer foam twice. Why? Because human beings don't do that. And if that were in a film by Mel Brooks or the folks who did Airplane!, well, that'd be fine. They aren't pretending to replicate human behavior. That's the point. And yes, this film is definitely a comedy, and yes, it was a joke, but it's not that kind of comedy, and this didn't feel like that kind of joke. It just felt bizarre. That the other guy is putting salt in his beer (which I have been told is A Thing) just makes it that much stranger. That Thomerson keeps trying to get super close to Stallone for no sane reason adds another layer of weird to it. It's not implying, as I first hoped, that he was attracted to Stallone. He's just plain weird.This is a masterpiece, in a very, very, very specific way. Its unnatural dialogue, complete misunderstanding of human behavior, and terrible acting are all par for a sort of Hollywood disaster course. But someone, somewhere, went to a lot of trouble to select the perfect cast of background extras for this film. Slackjaw, ZZ Top bearded, bad outfit-clad (though none worse than Stallone's foregrounded spectacle), chawing, shitkicking, pig-rustling, chicken-chasing weirdoes (the extra "E" is warranted) by the score line up behind Stallone, Parton, and Farnsworth in a beautiful Americana phantasmagoria of hicksploitative Yankee-eating mutants. And they come across as benign because, well, that's the sort of film this is, but they could easily have been cannibalistic white trash (like me!). Whoever cast them deserves a special award.You have been informed by others that Stallone can't sing, and that Parton can. This is simple fact. She also wears those ridiculous outfits better than he does. She also has a ferocious personality and beats down would-be rapists and patronizers without hesitation. She accedes to some humiliating moments in this film, but she's clearly aware of them in a way that suggests she will not allow them to beat her down. Dolly Parton is a goddamned hero, and the ruinous role she had to play in this could not defeat her. Go listen to "Coat of Many Colors" and revel in that beautiful tremble in her voice. She is by far the highlight of this film, in terms of things that are actually good and not simply bananas.Okay, to be fair, it's funny sometimes, too. Intentionally so. It knows it is a dumb movie, and it does not shy away from it. It basks in the obvious routes it has to take, culminating in a horse ride through New York that it is smart enough to lampshade. There are moments of real comedy, and sure, the unintentional comedy makes this a film worth seeing, especially with some friends.
